When Insults Had  Class....

 

churchill-cartoonThese glorious insults are from an era when cleverness with words was still valued, before a great portion of the English  language got boiled down to four letter words, not to mention waving middle fingers.

A member of Parliament to Disraeli: ‘Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.’ ‘That depends, Sir,’ said Disraeli, ‘on whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.’ ‘He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.’

- Winston Churchill

‘I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great  pleasure.’

- Clarence Darrow

‘He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader
to the dictionary.’

- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

‘Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big
words?’

- Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)

‘Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no
time reading it.’

-Moses Hadas

‘I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I
approved of it.’

- Mark Twain

‘He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.’

- Oscar Wilde

I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play;
bring a friend.... if you have  one.’

- George Bernard Shaw to Winston
Churchill

‘Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if
there is  one.’

- Winston Churchill, in response.

‘I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you
here.’

-Stephen Bishop

‘He is a self-made man and worships his creator.’

- John Bright

‘I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing
trivial.’

- Irvin S. Cobb

‘He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in
others.’-

-  Samuel Johnson

‘He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.’

- Paul Keating

‘There’s nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won’t cure.’

-Jack E. Leonard

‘He has the attention span of a lightning bolt.’

- Robert Redford

‘He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.’

- Forrest Tucker

‘Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any
address on it?’

- Mark Twain

‘His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.’

- Mae West

‘Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they
go.’

- Oscar Wilde

‘He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.’

- Billy Wilder

‘I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening but this wasn’t it.’
- Groucho Marx

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